Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2009 mr340 recovery tips, pt. 2

Field chief has rasberry slushee 4 U @ finish line. Free vitamin h2o,
whole grain bagels, & massage courtesy of chron's/colitis fun run in
frontier park. Live music & schafly American pale ale.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2009 mr340: onward rare west Tibetan mountain dog

The ashes of Trex, reknowned river dog, adventurist, mr340 racer, and Rare West Tibetan Mountain dog nonpareil, entombed in a glow-in-the-dark dinosaur were a stowaway in the 4th edition of the mr340. At sunrise Sunday they were released back into the river for a seaward journey of reincarnation.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2009 mr340: the next adventure awaits

Coffeedog's recycled boat sits behind the Lewis & Clark boathouse in St. Charles awaiting to be reclaimed by a new suite of downriver adventurists.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2000 mr340: quick recovery pt. 1

M.O.I. offers some quick recovery tips from the rigors of the longest
nonstop canoe/kayak race in the world.
Cucumber water.
Fresh peach and homegrown tomato salad.
Epsom salts.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2000 mr340: storms early, then sun

Pfefferkorn power. Jodi (left) and her sister Katie documented the rapidly changing conditions. Jodi with her camera and Little Miss Sunshine with her power stroke.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2009 mr340: field crew

My field crew did pretty much everything asked of them without
sneering, although steve, practicing 4 next year's event, was the only
one tough enuf 2 blow on my wounded feet .
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2000 mr340: tourist feet

Now that my swollen feet are swaddled in Katy trail souvenir socks I
can be a tourist. Farmers market 4 canteloupe & maters is next stop.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2009 mr340: 1st place

Dave Anderson (father in back) relaxes in the boathouse before the start of the mr340. Once the storms blew past, the 1000 hrs of training that Dave and his twin brother put in for the race helped best the field but they fell a bit shy of the record time set in 2008
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2009 mr340: black coffee and uncle-a-dog

Dudes with a sense of fun, humor, and a pickle bucket canoe made it to St. Charles
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

2009 mr340: warrior ant press women's solo winner

Melanie Hof of St. Louis, MO brought home the top prize in her first mr340.

The 2009 MR Warrior Ant Press Women's Solo Division Winners.
Official Results:

1st place, Melanie Hof, 55:58(hrs:min)
2nd place, Natalie Courson,57:41
3rd place, Karen Exon, 62:02
4th place, Jana MaCleland,65:53
Kudos to the others who raced.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

the 2009 mr340: the mixed tandem division

Lot's of talk this year about heated action in the mixed tandem division of the MR340. A number of teams new to the MR340 could provide surprises. However, the pairing of three time winner West Hansen with 2008 Women's solo champ, Katie Pfefferkorn, has to make them the odds on favorites. Expect a couple of local favorites to give them trouble along the way. As long as the anti-inflammatory agents work, I Be Pro Fun team (Chuck and Di McHenry) will make anyone serious about the race have suffer to stay in front. The Cedar Strippers, a pairing of one of last year's women's tandem winner, Tabatha Adkins, and versatile athlete Charlie Lockwood, may surprise folks with the quality of their craft.

But let's not forget last year's winners, the Ninja Raccoons, Mike Massey and Jana Shannon. Masters of down playing expectations the team utilizes a rigorous, yet unorthodox training regime to prepare for the race.

"It's 90 percent mental," said Massey recently while repeatedly hoisting pints of Boulevard Dry Stout. When asked if she was ready to defend her title, teamate Shannon casually remarked, "well, if by being ready, did I by the sunscreen, the answer is yes."
The Ninja Raccoons receive some last minute advice from personal trainer, Admiral Clever of the Le Cirque Imaginaire.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

the 2009 mr340: warrior ant press women's solo division

WAP breaks down the women's solo division for this year's Missouri River 340.

One thing is for certain-a new champion will be crowned in this year's race. Katie Pffefferkorn, 2008 champ and solo record-holder has decided to double down with ubiqitous MR340 winner West Hansen. Eric Magee is serving and protecting this year and can't race.

This year 18 women will fight for the top spot on the sandbar. Here's a few to watch:

Natalie Courson, St. Peters, MO #1460. Natalie and Di McHenry won the women's tandem division in 2007 in record-setting time. She can go the distance.







Liz Doubet, Columbia, MO #2525. As a volunteer for Missouri River Relief who'll be manning safety boats along the race, Liz will have plenty of folks to cheer her downriver.

Karen Exon, Topeka, KS #3333. Karen finished just out of the money last year and will be looking to move up onto the podium.

Christina Glauner, Lawrence, KS #0340. Three time MR340 veteran Christina have finished every year. Christina carries a quiet determination and a relaxed attitude about the world but she may log more time in a kayak than most anyone on the river. This could be her year.

Melanie Hof, St. Louis, MO #2239. Melanie trains and motivates college atheletes for a living. Can she listen to her own logic?

Chris Jump, Lawrence, KS #3664. Chris and her partner won the women's tandem division in 2008. This year she solos her way downriver.

Hilary Kelly, Leavenworth, KS. Marine mettle found this newbie finishing 3rd in her first race. Warning to others. This year she's been training...in a boat.

JoJo Newbold, St. Louis, MO #5656. Fast and furious. An expert whitewater kayaker, if she can pace herself properly she should be able to stay in this race till the end.

Catrina Severson, Berea, OH #0822. If they ever include fishing as part of this race, Comrade Goldfish Goddess would surely win. Although this is her first attempt at the MR340, the relative flatwater of the MO River shouldn't be a problem for someone who's adept at simultaneously saltwater casting and paddling through ocean swells.

Adkins and Jump, 2007 Women's Tandem Winners.

Or will one of these first timers surprise the field?
Kris Albright, Fenton, MO #9360.
Traci Lynn Martin, Lee's Summit, MO #1150
Deborah Graham, Oak Grove, MO #1930
Pamela Greer, Kansas City, MO #1818
Cyndie Guffey, O'Fallon, MO #1112
Meghan McCullah, Columbia, MO #0421
Megan Haskamp, Glasgow, MO #4551
Jana McClelland, Hannibal, MO #6329
Christy Yount, Macon, MO #0906.

Stay tuned beginning Tuesday @ 8 am to find out. We'll be posting a few mobile blogs from the race. Or consult the rivermiles.com leaderboard for the the latest.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

win one, lose one

Now that the Mayor has won his volunteer lawsuit against the City one has to wonder if he has the sense to leave his wife at home. A legal victory is quite different from a political one.
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duff lite solutions

I think it's great that the President sat down and had a beer with Harvard Professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. and Sgt. James Crowley. Really. Nothing but good should come from this. Maybe they'll even learn a little something about beer in the process. The President will be drinking a Bud Lite - which either makes him a pantywaist watching his carbs, an uniformed beer drinker, or a member of the wine and cheese set. Dude! I'm a member of, among other drinking clubs, the wine and cheese set, but I know enough to not drink skunky, watered-down beer. Drink a real beer, not some beer that takes 15 minutes to make.

Wouldn't Amber Wavers American Ale from Washington's own Capitol City Brewing be more appropriate for the White House than one brewed by a Belgian Company? The Belgians make some of the best beers in the world but Anheiser-Busch products aren't one of them. Or better yet, how about one of the Wild Dogs from the largest brewery in Maryland, Flying Dog.

Biggie O may be well read but he probably hasn't read this post about lite beer. Beer, good hand-crafted beer, is good for you, especially if taken in moderation. Lite beer, if taken in moderation or even in excess, is never a good idea.

are you sure you want a lite?
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

ten places to watch the mr340

Here are 10 places to watch the first day action of the MR340-the longest nonstop canoe/kayak race in the world. This year, approximately 300 boats and 500 racers will depart Kaw Point, the confluence of the Kansas and Missouri Rivers, to begin a journey to St. Charles. Racers have 88 hours to make the 340 miles. (Links are highlighted below as are etimated arrival times of the first racers).

1. Panaramic view of Missouri and Kansas Rivers, Kaw Point, KC, KS.

1. Kaw Point, Kansas City, KS. (8:00 am) If you want to feel the adrenalin of the start this is the place to be. But plan on arriving early because this place will be a zoo. Ample parking outside of the floodwall. This is a great spot to watch the prep, see the boats, and the racers. The downside of Kaw Point, besides the traffic this year, is that once the gun goes off (8 am sharp) you'll soon be seeing the backsides of the racers.

2.
Case Park/Clark's Point, Quality Hill, Kansas City, MO(8:01 am) If you work downtown and can't afford to be too late for work then this park offers several vantage points to see the first mile of fleeting action. Bring a pair of binoculars are use the one on the tripod by the Lewis and Clark statue.

3. View upstream and down from Town of Kansas Pedestrian Bridge, foot of Main St., Kansas City, MO

3. Town of Kansas Pedestrian Bridge. (8:10 am) Probably one of the best spots to view the action as the racers will come into view after they round the first bend. By this time, the leaders will have begun to separate a little but the rest of the pack should still be embroiled in bedlam. Bring a cup of coffee and come early for a spot with a good view. Afterwards have breakfast at Succotash in the RiverMarket.

4. Kites, Richard L. Berkeley Park, 4th of July, 2009.

4. Richard L. Berkeley Riverfront Park.(8:15 am) The poor design of this park is offset by the fact that this year, Friends of the River, are hosting a viewing party. With only 338 miles remaining, the cat and mouse game will have begun in earnest.

5. Riverfront Park.(8:30 am) This was KC's riverfront park before toxic waste and Berkeley decided to upstage them. Located off Riverfront Road in the East Bottoms Industrial area.

6. La Benite Park, Sugar Creek, MO. (10:30 am) Huge sycamores line the banks of the river here; one could pack a picnic and bring the family. A few racers will be pulling off here to tweak their boats or resupply but most will be cruising past this point.

7. Fort Osage. (11 am) Take in the recently opened exhibits at this National Historic Landmark. Abundant shade. Expect the first casualities of the race to start bailing here.

8. Lexington, MO(1 pm). The first checkpoint. Here you can see what paddling 50 miles in August in Missouri does to a person. More casualties and mayhem as people scramble to get in and out their boats in a hurry. Fresh Missouri peaches in town!

9. Waverly, MO(3 pm). A couple of hours before sundown would be a good time grab a grilled burger or hot dog from the locals and see who's cracking and who's still got it.

10. Stump Island Park, Glasgow, MO (Wednesday morning). Here's your chance to take a ferry ride across the Mighty MO and have breakfast at the Riverside Cafe. Ferry service begins at 6 am.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

moi v. brown and williamson

Many of us like to stand in judgement of our hometown sports teams-especially when they suck as badly as the KC Royals. Some lament the poor pitching, others the lack of power, and still others the blundering mishaps. Although these traits are definitely problematic for a professional club to own, potentially they are solvable. However, until the current owner, David Glass, stops treating the team as just another mediocre Walmart franchise, the team will remain trashed. Apparently manager Trey Hillman shaved his 'stache after the latest 10 game losing streak which has momentarily stopped the bleeding and given some fans reason again to hope the team can at least play .500 ball.

Speaking of mediocre franchises moi learned something last week. One benefit of losing your mother to lung cancer and a heart attack, to detesting second-hand smoke, and a major-league dislike of greedy corporations is that it makes it fairly easy to get recused from serving on a month long jury trial involving the malfeasance of Big Tobacco. My disdain for the stupidity of white trash rednecks who smoke Kools for 50 years because they think they are a healthy alternative to unfiltered Camels and my love for film, including The Insider, also may have worked in my favor.

After being dismissed from this jury (if I didn't have a day job it might have been interesting to listen to two sides of America laying a shit trail for 4 weeks), I discovered that this case has already been tried once. And found in favor of the people who apparently have yet to discover that the basis of advertising is a LIE. The retrial courtesy of a technicality expounded by an appellate court. At this point many would give up but whenever there's lots of money involved people tend to keep grubbing for worms until the dirty end.

Yes. I know nicotine is the most addictive substance on the planet. OK. I know it's hard to stop smoking. And cancer deaths from smoking are horrible and sad. I know the tobacco companies lied and cheated and did (and do) most anything to keep people addicted to the product-the drug delivery system. But the link between the habit and the death it causes is apparently clear to everyone except those who still believe that the Royals have a chance this year to make the playoffs.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

butterflies are free: damien hurst and lance armstrong


Lance Armstrong, who has a finally figured out a way to make even the French like him, will be riding a custom Trek Madone decorated by the artist Damien Hurst when he rides laps around the Champs Elysees today on his way to a 3rd place finish in the General Classification of the 2009 edition of Le Tour. Decorating a bike with Hurst butterfly decals is a bit like putting playing cards used by Scotty Nguyen in the spokes except that the Armstrong/Hurst bike is expected to fetch ridiculous sums at auction, the proceeds to benefit the Livestrong Foundation.
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Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA. Warrior Ant Press Worldwide Anthill Headquarters in Kansas City, Missouri, USA.

the funk recieves a standing eight count

Mark Funkhouser suffered another defeat at the hands of the City Council on Thursday. Everyone deserves their day in court but Funk was handed a political decision in closed council chambers. The council voted 7-3 (Funkhouser abstained) to settle the discrimination lawsuit with former aid, Ruth Bates, for $550,000--up from the original $30,000 settlement negotiated between attorneys in the case. That settlement was blown up when Funkhouser, who somehow managed to lose most of the political insight that got him elected in the first place, decided to release a press release publicly slamming the plaintiff within hours of the first settlement.

Do the math. $550,000 minus $30,000 equals $520,000. That's the amount that the council was willing to pay to sink any chance the Mayor might have had at a second term. For a guy touted to be 'smart with the money' the Mayor has squandered KC's on more than one occasion. Remember the La Raza incident? That one cost the city several million dollars in lost tourism dollars. Being stubborn can turn a person into an intractable idiot.

Will Funkhouser ever realize that being Mayor should be less about him (or her!) and more about The City? In the operatic theater of KC politics "it ain't over till the fat lady sings" (how very true in this case) but the brightest future for the Mayor will likely be the candlelit confines of his rustic Ozark cabin. Maybe there will enough chinks between the logs to let some illuminating shafts of light leak into his life.
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