mr340 river race update no.9

mr340 river race update no.9

Food consumed to date (what I can remember):
1 bowl of oatmeal w/ raisins and banana
1 homemade gravlax sandwich on toasted farmhouse pepita bread.
1 peanut butter sandwich/banana on toasted farmhouse pepita bread.
2 oranges.
2 cups fresh cherries.
2 tubes of homemade goo (brown rice syrup/agave syrup/chocolate/p.nut butter/coffee).
8 power bars of various permutations containing in no particular order: almonds, sesame seeds, hemp seeds, rasins, coconut, apricots, dates, peanuts, date syrup, and who knows what else.
GO GO jelly bellies. These are great. Elecrolyte jelly beans. 2 packages.
1 bag of granola including also homemade dried pears, cherries, apricots, and chocolat-covered raisins.
4 sheets of homemade fruit leather-blueberry, cherry, apricot.
1 12 oz bar of extra dark chocolat.

Pretty much everything is done to maintain the following.
~200-300 calories per hour
~40-60 g of carbohydrates
~10 g of protein

Elsewhere:
real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.8

mr340 river race. update no.8 - more smiley faces

This is the smiley face you can see between mile marker 160 and 150. This is what paddling for 20 hours a days for 2 straight days will do to you. It's the electric Gatorade acid test and all I can say, is you'd better embrace it, go with it, ride it out, or you're in trouble. Dawn will come soon enough.

Sometime this smiley face will attach itself to a can buoy. When that happens, just say hi and keep going. You make it through to the other side and you're go to go to the finish. This is why some people do this race. For the hallucinations that happen on the second night. It's a vision quest thing? without the mescaline. perhaps it's just the quirky combination of sleep deprivation and electrolyte imbalance.

Smiles 2 ya!

Elsewhere:
real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.7

mr340 river race update no. 7

Nun buoy on the left, can buoy on the right. Going downstream keep the left-leaning nuns on your left and the jar heads on your right and the shipping channel, the deepest, fastest, part of the current is right between them -- right in the middle! They mark the channel. I know the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers has spent millions and millions and millions of our tax dollars to straighten and narrow the channel for the 2 barges a year that use the upper Missouri, but that's a pretty narrow channel. I went around this freaky pair.

Elsewhere:
real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.6

mr340 race update no.6 - smiley face

Lot's of people who do this race are fond of smiley faces in blog posts. For some reason they love them. Smiley faces with tears, with expressions of surprise!, smiley faces taking a bath, smiley faces riding a motorcycle. You name it, there seems to be a smiley where an adjective would do. They distribute them wildly, thrown like candy from the back of a parade float, like m & m's to a sick child, like free drinks on a bartender's last day on the job.

I submit. I'm tired. It's hot. I'm sleep and coffee-deprived. Here's a smiley face to add to your collection.
Elsewhere:
real-time race results

mr340 river race update no. 5

mr340 river race. update no.5

These are the fluids consumed during the first 24 hours -- 12 liters of h2o and 8 liters of go juice. That may be the most difficult aspect of the race, staying hydrated and figuring out how to get potable water and what I call GO JUICE, or more affectionately, the stuff that keeps you from dying. It's my own blend of Gatorade (the powdered form and NO!, I don't sniff it), Accelerade (a Gatorade with protein that tastes like chalk), fruit/vegetable juice blend, and H20. Mixing all of these things together makes for a grayish-purplish liquid that's palatable. And keeps the cramps at bay. A leg cramp in a kayak is more than a drag.

Elsewhere:
real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.4

mr340 river race. update no. 4

I like to bring a book along. Don't know why exactly, I just feel a little naked when I don't have one. I'm trying to save weight. The first year I had about 300 lbs of gear, it was a little much. But in my favor, I did have only a slim volume, Sam Shepard's play, "Curse of the Starving Class". Even though I frequently stopped and napped under shade trees I was still too busy to read. Last year, in a determined effort to finish, I made my ground crew carry my book (just too good to put down but a bit heavy to carry in the kayak) and at each re-supply point while they were busy doing things like setting up my tent, or changing out my camelback, I'd knock off a few pages of Anna Karenina in the restroom. They never even knew.

But this year my motto is "Work harder, play harder, live more." So I vow to do all three in this compressed version of life. I don't pull out the book till after dinner, till I've put in 50 miles and feel as though there's already a level of accomplishment. Boats are arriving and leaving the first checkpoint. There's one more to make by 11 pm.

A couple of mile out from the checkpoint, I pull the book from the dry sack. A tandem begins to move around me as I slow and seeing that I'm reading something, says, "how far to Waverly?"

"Twenty five miles, due east. Here let me read you something before darkness descends around us."

"It called," HOW THE WATER FEELS TO THE FISHES

Like the fur of a chinchilla. Like the cleanest tooth. Yes, the fishes say, this is what it feels like. People always ask the fishes, "What does the water feel like to you?" and the fishes are always happy to oblige. Like feathers are to other feathers, they say. Like powder touching ash. When the fishes tell us these things, we begin to understand. We begin to think we know what the water feels like to the fishes. But it's not always like fur and ash and the cleanest tooth. At night, they say, the water can be different. At night when it's very cold, it can be like the tongue of a cat. At night when it's very, very cold, the water is liked cracked glass. Or honey. Or forgiveness, they say-ha ha. When the fishes answer these questions--which they are happy to do--they also ask why. They are curious fish are, and thus they ask, Why? Why do you want to know what the water feels like to the fishes? And we are never quite sure.

Dave Eggers

"Fantastic!" they say in unison and power their boat downriver.

"Yes. Yes it is."

Elsewhere:
real-time race results

mr340 river race update no.3

mr340 river race. update no.3
Dang. Can't forget about the racers. Was going to take pictures of some of the entrants during last nite's pre-race safety meeting and at Kaw Point when folks where staging their boats but got too busy talking to take very many. Here's one. Bryan Hopkins. Columbia, MO. Bryan is definitely in the mix to take the men's solo with his new Huki surf ski. Bryan's got the right attitude, is trained up, and knows the river like no one else.

Others to look for are Carter Johnson, Jeff Weueste (sp?), and off course the Dark Horse Paddler, Joe Mann. Probably somebody else I don't know about who could be near the front. The winner will the one who sleeps the less. You won't be able to sleep and win this race. Not this year.

mr340 river race update no.2

mr240 race update no.2 - the start

This is how it begins. You start with a confluence, in this case the Kansas and the Missouri Rivers, a city, and some people willing to get in a boat and paddle. For a while. Pretty simple stuff when you get down to it.


What else. Throw in some Lewis and Clark re-enactors, some tough-as-nails sailors, some Amazonians, some people out to prove something to others, to themselves, some looking for adventure, some for solace, some for a difficult journey, some to perservere. I guess since we're ending this year at the Lewis and Clark Boathouse in St. Charles I can put up with the re-enactors. Everyone else makes sense.

Throw in a dj. Ok, definitely not as cool as LL, but still a dj. But a dj at 7 o'clock in the morning. Rich even by my taste.

mr340 river race update no.1

mr340 river race. update no. 1

Warrior Ant Press is trying something different. We're blogging during the race. We''re also in the race. We're sponsoring the Women's Solo Division. We're blogging. Why not?

The tool. A OLPC (one laptop per child) notebook. It's small (fits inside a gallon ziplock baggie). It's rugged, waterproof, has a long-life battery, and it has wireless capability.

Don't know how this is going to work, so bear with us. Although we'll be taking photos along the way, they take too much time to upload so we're going to rely on our bank of stock photos. Bear with us on this one as we work out the bugs of trying to bring you updates while the race is going on. They do it on Le Tour, (well not the competitors) so why not the MR340?

Also, we'll try to post 2-3 times a day, but remember, we also have to paddle, and we want to get downriver, we have no idea of how often we'll find hot spots, so if nothing pops up, then don't assume we've abandoned all hope. We will not be able to respond to any posted comments. Got to draw the line somewhere.

Check our progress after about 5 pm on the rivermiles (see below) leader board. If you're receiving personal race updates via our text messaging service you can post those times in the comments section for others to see.

Paddles up.

Elsewhere:
real-time race results

trails kc!

From the Kansas City communications office.

City announces trail system logo and naming competition winners

The City of Kansas City, Mo., trail system has a new name and logo thanks to two Kansas City, Mo., residents who entered the City Planning and Development Department's contest. The winning entries were selected from more than 300 submissions.

Ron Simmons submitted the name "Trails KC!," which will be featured on the bottom of a logo created by Molly Paugh. For winning the contests, Paugh will receive a $1,000 prize donated by Kansas City River Trails Inc., and Simmons will receive a Gary Fisher hybrid bike donated by Cycle City.

The Trails KC! name and logo will appear on trail system maps, promotional material and trail signage for the trail system outline in the Trails KC! plan. The trail plan includes an interconnected system of trails to serve pedestrians, recreational bicyclists, commuters and equestrians. Implementing the plan is a key component toward achieving the City's goal to receive platinum designation from the American League of Bicyclists by 2020.

The Trails KC! Plan has been reviewed at community meetings and will continue to be available for public comment via meetings scheduled for late summer/early fall.

The new logo and draft of the Trails KC! plan are available at http://www.kcmo.org/planning.nsf/plnpres/kcmotrails_home.

bush to treasury secretary

Dude. Get out your ass out there and say something! Positive! And I don't care what you do, sell the damn brewery to the Belgians if you have to, but do something now. My ratings are nearing 15% positive, and that's low, even by my standards.

the cost of losing La Raza

If Mayor Funkhouser had done a better job vetting Francis Semler for the Parks Board and if the Mayor had realized the error of his judgement sooner and DONE A BETTER JOB COMPROMISING, then Kansas City would be hosting the La Raza convention this week and both presidential candidates would be in town giving speeches. Instead they're in LA.

Cheney's doctors tighten the screws

Dick "the Dick" Cheney was given the a-OK on his recent checkup. His heart is apparently fine. In case you've forgotten, this is what Cheney's heart looks like.

pull down the martha shade

We at Warrior Ant Press are losing our patience with the whole Obama campaign fake rhethoric of "oh my! I can't do that, it might offend someone. Got to vote for warrantless-wiretapping cause the suburban moms might not vote for me. Bernie Mac. Dude. Such raunchy humor from a black man, tone in down."

Come on. F_that. Let's get some backbone here and standup for what needs to be done in this country.

I'm with Martha Shade. Be a damn progessive or be a Republican. We got enough spineless Democrats already.


Here's some Bernie Mac for you. Listen to it. Laugh. And tell Obama to get jiggy widit or expect to be McGruff the Crime Dog's bitch come November.

Photo credit: Martha Shade by Brian Lee, NY Times.

are those beets or a joke about beets?

Neither. It's beet ice cream w/ caramelized walnuts. It's good. And good for you.

“HarperCollins remains thrilled to count Jessica Seinfeld on its roster of talented authors, and continues to stand unequivocally behind her work.” So said Steve Ross, the publisher of Collins, the imprint of Harper Collins that published Seinfeld's cookbook “Deceptively Delicious.”

That's a funny name for a book especially if you're being sued for plagiarism by the author of another, very similar book, but I guess she thought no one would get the joke.

We note though, in Mr. Ross's defense, that Harper's also counts Laura and Jenna Bush, who may have sold a few books but can't write for shit, as part of its stable of talented authors.

mccain's ineligibility

Turns out that not only did spending 5 years in a N. Vietnamese prison not qualify McGruff the Crime Dog to be President, he's not qualified under the U.S. Constitution because he's not as he needs to be, "natural-born citizen." We call this a lose lose lose situation.

McCain was born in the Panama Canal Zone in 1936 to U.S. citizens. The law that allowed children of American parents born in the canal zone to be U.S. citizens was written passed one year after McCain's birth and citizenship retroactively. Sure it's a technicality, but the Constitution says "natural born."

Republicans, who like laws, except when they don't, have chosen once again to ignore the Constitution and it's Amendments, in this case the 14th. I'm not saying the law makes any sense but aren't these the same folks who are always trotting out the law and waving it around at folks.

mr340: the warrior ant press women's solo division

Things to do with your economic stimulus check from El Presidento Bush. Contribute to a campaign to have Bush and Dick "the Dick" Cheney impeached; probably a little late in the term for that to stick even after we find out that Cheney's office worked to alter EPA documents to minimize the human impacts of global climate disruption, "Data isn't fact" for this administration, even if it's the data from 99.8 percent of the scientists who study the issue.

Or you could donate the money to a not-for-profit (may I be so bold so as to suggest the fine folks at Habitat ReStore?) Sustainability times 3.

Or you could underwrite the women's solo division of the 2008 MR340 river race, the longest canoe/kayak/surfski race in the world. The Chief Financial Officer of WAP, who's been silly enough to do the race since it's inception, endorsed his check to the fine folks at RiverMiles (the race organizers) and is now a corporate big-wig and sponsor of the MR 340 Warrior Ant Press Women's Solo Division. We built that huge office building for a reason! To house the Warrior Ants.

The women's solo division is shaping up to be a battle between the defending champion and favorite, Texan, Erin "One Woman, Focused and Driven" Magee, and the upstart phenom, Katie Pfefferkorn. Last year they finished one-two and some are speculating this could be the year of the youngster. But Magee will not go easily. Erin has finished first in 10 straight Texas Water Safari's (affectionately called "the toughest canoe race in the world"). Nine of those first place finishes were solo, one was tandem. Erin also set the MR340 women's solo record of 55 hours 33 minutes in her first MR340, blasting 42 hours off the 2006 record.

But in 2007, Pfefferkorn, in only her second year of competitive kayaking, and at half the age of Magee, finished a strong second shaving 40 hours off her 2006 and finishing a mere 3 1/2 behind the stalwart Magee. Pfefferkorn has traded up to a full-on racing canoe this year and it might be the difference. Will power and determination could be the deciding factor between them.

Participants in The Warrior Ant Press MR340 Women's Solo Division.
Karen Exon, Topeka, KS #3333
Jamie Freeman, Cape Girardeau, MO #4044
Carol Heddinghaus, Rolla, MO #3907
Hillary Kelly, Leavenworth, KS, #8814
Erin Magee, Martindale, TX #4971
JoJo Newbold, St. Louis, MO #5656
Katie Pfefferkorn, Ottumwa, IA, #1459

1st Place. $500
2nd Place. $100
3rd Place. $50

Images. Upper. Dawn Keller before the start of 2006 MR340.
Bottom. Byran Hopkins and Katie Pfefferkorn @ Kaw Point, start of 2006 MR340.
Elsewhere:
erin magee on race fit 2 paddle
ny times on the texas water safari
pfefferkorn in the columbia missourian
profiles of three 2008 racers in se missourian
profiles of six 2007 racers in se missourian

artists go green, con-ed to follow

Here's some interesting work that came to the attention of Warrior Ant Press that deal with global climate disruption (it's more than just change).Eve Mosher's work, HighWaterLine, a Brooklyn-based artist who walked around Long Island with a chalk line machine (just like the ones used to lay down the foul lines at a baseball game) marking the water line from increased flooding that would result from large-scale sea-level changes and climate disruption. At one point, Ms. Mosher, was ordered to stop, because she was scaring the locals, driving down property values, and raising insurance rates for areas that would be expected to be frequently inundated. We'd rather keep our head in the sand, errr, peat bog.

Another favorite is the Lemon Everlasting Backyard Battery by Susan Cockrell and Ted Purves, who harvested excess lemons from backyard trees and made preserves and marmalade in the community of San Jose, California. When life gives you lemon, make lemonade; when art gives you lemons, build a community.

On to the Netherlands, a country that could benefit from a slowing down of carbon emissions, with this question, "Could art change the climate?" With this question seventeen international artists were sent into the Waterloopbos, an almost exotic forest in the Netherlands and asked to build artworks that addressed Global Climate Change. The environmental setting is in the ruins of a former, open air laboratory where hydraulic engineers worked for several decades to find solutions for hydrodynamic problems all over the world. The Laboratory has now been taken over by the forest (Waterloopbos), and is managed by the Nature Monument Association. Amongst overgrown sluices, harbours and river courses, the artists worked on location on a new view on the typically Dutch battle against the water.

One positive effect of global climate disruption is that the Blue Man Group is expected to be inundated forever.






Elsewhere:
pedro marzorati
kunstbroedplaats
Or in a special issue of NYFA Current, sponsored (and we aren't making this up) by Con Edison—New York City. new york foundation for the arts

bush to medvedev

You one smart, sexy Russian. Eyes like Vladamir, soul like Putin. Don't let this be our last meeting together.

missouri river 340 canoe & kayak race

Release July 7, 2006

What: MR340 river race: the longest non-stop canoe/kayak race in world.
Where: Missouri River from Kansas City to St.Charles.
Start: 8 AM, Tuesday July 15th, 2008, Kaw Point Access, Kansas City, KS.
Awards ceremony: Friday, July 18th, 7:00 pm, Lewis & Clark Boathouse, St. Charles, MO.
Race officially ends: noon, Saturday, July 19th
Contact Person(s):
Scott Mansker, 913-244-4666 (scott@rivermiles.com)
Russ Payzant, 913-548-5101 (russ@rivermiles.com)
Karin Thomas, 913-220-3271 (karin@rivermiles.com)

As floodwaters recede on Midwest rivers, canoeists and kayakers from all over the United States, Canada, Belize, and Japan are readying to test the Missouri River in the longest non-stop canoe/kayak race in the world. The race takes place every year on the Missouri River from Kansas City to St. Charles in the full-force heat and humidity of a Missouri summer. Given the recent high river levels, race organizer Scott Mansker expects records to be set that may hold up for many years to come. If records are to fall, racers will have to paddle cross-state in 2 days or less. That’s non-stop with no sleep, avoiding debris jams, barges, fatigue, heat exhaustion, and relentless pursuit from competitors.

Jim Low, who has written about the event since its beginnings, calls the MR340 an “authentic adventure” in a time when very few experiences can qualify as such. Drew Lemberger, who guides on the Missouri River, agrees, “The MR340 was the most challenging experience of my life, and I’ve had a few.” For last year’s race, Drew built a tandem kayak, convinced his boss to paddle for 3 ½ straight days, and still managed to keep his day job. The paint is still curing on Drew’s recently built racing kayak which he’ll paddle solo in this year’s race.

A number of Missouri-based racers have their eyes on being the first to arrive in St. Charles, but to date, no home-grown soloists have managed to stand atop the podium come race end. In order to win, they’ll have to leave in their wake adventure sport legend David Kelly as well as 24-hour record holder for flat-water paddling and ultra-marathon machine Carter Johnson - the men’s solo-record holder in the 260-mile Texas Water Safari, 420-mile Yukon River Quest, and 300-mile Water Tribe Everglades Challenge. Katie Pfefferkorn, an upstart phenom with enough mettle to challenge for the women’s solo division title last in just her second year of racing, may have the moxy this year to overcome the focused and determined Erin Magee. Magee, the 2007 MR340 winner, has 10 consecutive (9 times as a soloist) first-place Texas Water Safari finishes.

Racers will compete this year in 6 categories. Men’s and Women’s Solo; Men’s, Women’s and Mixed Tandem, and Team Unlimited (4-6 racers). The Missouri River 340 is a canoe/kayak race across the state of Missouri, July 15-19. Contestants will paddle 340 miles, from Kansas City to St. Charles, virtually non-stop and must complete the race within 100 hours.

For more information about the Missouri River 340 contact Scott Mansker, 913-244-4666 or on the web at www.rivermiles.com.

River Miles, protecting our river resources through participation.